The first time I said it,
we were standing
in his drive, the blue
ribbon of my car’s
exhaust wavering.
I want to leave
my husband, I said,
as if I could exchange
the life I had
like shoes bought
a half size
too small,
trade the corn-
tasseled flatness
for pines and lime-
stone. I say it
even now, I want to
leave my husband, as I
play and replay
his words until
I don’t want you to
becomes I don’t want you,
and the crush
of wheels on gravel.
AMANDA NEWELL’s work has appeared in publications such as Bellevue Literary Review, Gargoyle, Pearl, Poet Lore, War, Literature & the Arts, and Zone 3, among others. She has been awarded scholarships by the Bread Loaf Writers’ Conference and The Frost Place and has also been a fellow at the Virginia Center for the Creative Arts. She teaches English at The Gunston School on the Eastern Shore of Maryland and is currently pursuing her MFA at Warren Wilson College.